image credit: Great Wave of Transformation—Amanda Sage
Ayahuasca generates a special kind of light. Peruvian author Cesar Calvo writes of how ayahuasca “irrigates the unknown territory: that is its way of shedding light.” I love his description of the plant’s alluring “black light,” the light that illuminates your consciousness and your most intimate hidden realities.
When I speak of the light of ayahuasca, I mean light in both senses of the word—feeling lighter and freer, more elevated, and also brighter, shinier—illuminated from within. This kind of light is vibrational, not only seen with the eyes but also felt with the subtle senses, an upgrade that generates a feeling of elevation, maybe even joy. This is spiritual light, subtle light, the fundamental light of conscious awareness and the basic essence of each of us.
I’m fascinated by the afterglow phenomenon that seems to follow an ayahuasca experience. In the days after, you may feel this as a heart-opening expansion or a subtle sense of elevation. Things seem clearer and more spacious, somehow more clean. At least temporarily, you feel more sensitised (the flip side being that you might also feel disturbed by your everyday surroundings and routines—what was previously normal can become unbearable.)
Touched by this feeling of illumination post-ceremony, people often ask, “How can I stay like this permanently?” I don’t know about permanence.: some degree of descent is inevitable in my experience. Ayahuasca, like other master plants, show us what is possible; it’s up to us to maintain this. As Alonso del Rio says, the plants “lend us their light until we are able to find our own source.”
And yes, there are ways to tune into the flow and maximise the felt sense of goodness and expansion you’re experiencing. A very basic one is to maintain your post-ceremony restrictions and stay away from drugs, alcohol, pork, caffeine, and low-grade media.
Here’s a short list of practices (there are countless more) to orient towards this light—just like how a plant grows.
Turn On the Music. Music is an intrinsic part of ceremony, be it neo-shamanic medicine songs or indigenous. Here’s a short Spotify playlist with a few of my favorites; explore the musicians and search for more. Listen, yes, and sing, and dance too.
Tune Into Nature. Witness the beauty, the precision, the elegance, the intricacy of a plant’s growth. Right now I’m looking at the young living shoots of the jasmine vine by my door that each day push forth a little further, their tender buds unfolding into the world. Spend some time gazing at a plant and feel how it orients to the light, just as we do.
Ground Yourself. Riffing further on the Nature theme, sit on the earth and visualise sending your energy—your roots—deeper and deeper, dropping down into the center of the planet. Vajrayana meditation teacher Reggie Ray has some profound earth meditations. Paradoxically, the more deeply you are rooted, the more light you can sustain. Just like a plant, again.
Offer Prayer. Often when people feel stuck, confused, or afraid, I’ll suggest to them: Ask for what you need. Whatever your spiritual context around Something Bigger, whether you call it Source, Creator, God/dess, the Universe, the Divine, Jesu Cristo, Shakti—reach out and ask for the protection, support, guidance you most need. “HELP” is perhaps the most fundamental human prayer. If a powerful ayahuasca experience has blown you open, you’re already one step closer to connecting to that which is greater than you. It takes the humility that a medicine experience often delivers, an opening to dimensions possibly greater than what you’ve previously considered possible, and the sincere willingness to reach out.
Express Gratitude. I’m not suggesting making a static list of things you’re grateful for, but rather marinating in the embodied felt sense of gratitude as you pluck these from the present moment: I am grateful for the earth (feeling the living essence of it beneath you). For the air (breathing it into your lungs). For the water (sensing it cascading over your body). The warmth of the sun (softening to receive more). The sound of my daughter’s voice, the intricacies of my kidneys so miraculously filtering my blood, the strength of my pumping heart, the sensitivity of my ears . . . every moment has a hundred marvels to be grateful for.
Do Some Space-Clearing. This can be an inspiring way to chart a new course post-retreat: pick a room and clean it from top to bottom. Then bring in flowers, light candles, burn incense or juniper, and set your intentions to clear and bless this space, using your hands to move the energy. Karen Kingston’s space-clearing methods generate tangible results.
Take a Flower Bath. This jungle practice really works to clean and elevate energy. In a big pot or bucket of warm-ish water, marinate crushed fragrant herbs/flowers overnight. Right after your regular shower, while you’re still in the tub, pour the flower water over the crown of your head and down your body. Let your hair and body air-dry, leaving on the bits of leaves and petals that may have stuck. You can repeat this a few times a week, or whenever you feel obstacles and obscurations sticking to you.
Meditate. This doesn’t mean sitting ramrod-straight and attempting to suppress all thoughts. Rather, relax (it is nice if your spine can be straight, but not absolutely essential). Breathe into your heart. Remember an uplifting or amazing moment from your ayahuasca experience—maybe a new understanding of what love is, or the illuminating realisation that you actually have what you seek. Bringing this memory to mind, really feel what this is like in your body: sink into the energy, feel it as really real. Rest in this feeling state a few minutes, then release. Just a few minutes of dropping in each day helps install the realisations more deeply, and opens the channel for more. “Short moments, many times,” as my Tibetan teacher used to say.
Easiest of All: Take an integrative nap. Lie down when you’re feeling tired, confused, or lost. If your time is limited, set a timer. Say a quick prayer, and surrender to the sensations of your body and the support of the surface beneath you. Let the light work in, on and around you as you sleep.
